ever feel like this?
Description
im feeling a tad down right now. ive had one of those days where i just dont feel like i connected with either of the kids. its one of those days where i feel like i just observed. I know that i did heaps with them, and loved and cuddled and kissed and played. but sitting here now reflecting, it just seemed to be one of those days. sigh ill just have to do better tomorrow!
lately ive been reading many mom blogs. some depress me (ok make me feel thoroughly inadequate) and others inspire me. there are those who seem to have it all! the cook, clean, bake, homeschool, have scores of children, manage to blog once if not twice a day, love God whole-heartedly and can preach the gospel so eloquently. Does this come with time and practise? is it an age thing? or am i just down-right useless? look, i try hard, but just never seem to get there. i am horrid at doing the washing, i do bake and cook, my house is only spotless on the 2 days a week the cleaning lady comes, i hardly blog… you get my drift? maybe i just need small goals!
on a completely different note, jessie seems to have dropped her daytime nap. she sleeps between 10 and 11 hours a night and just fights at nap time. so i quit fighting her and just introduced a quiet time. the thing is that come 4ish she is finished and will often nap in the car if we go out. for most kids a 20minute nap is enough to push them through till bedtime. not miss jess! if she naps after 2, she goes until 10pm! then sleeps very late the next morning, and so it goes. so now from 4ish i push her to stay awake. but am starting to feel bad. arrrggghhh maybe im just succumbing to everyone!
i let too much noise into my head. i need to just go with my instict and let that play out. some days i really think mothering is just an on-the-fly thing. see, we dont have much of a routine bar eating times. jessie will eat at more-or-less the same time everyday. but thats where its stops. same with jack. when hes hungry he feeds, when hes tired he sleeps. i know after how many hours he needs to sleep, but there is no set time. but it works for me/us.
i guess im just having one of those days!